Movies are magical.
As a medium, the motion picture is as if photography, theater and music got together and had a beautiful love child. Few forms of artistic expression provide an immersive, sensory experience more so than the cinematic arts. Movies have become woven into the fabric of our cultures and societies. Movies remind us of the past, allow us to visit fantastic worlds, help us understand each other, and teach us about the world around us.
I’ve always loved movies. While growing up, films like Star Wars, Indiana Jones and Superman mesmerized me and unleashed my imagination. As a teenager, I found inspiration and hope through classics like Rocky, Rudy and Field of Dreams. I must have watched Monty Python and the Holy Grail, Tommy Boy and Billy Madison a hundred times with my high school friends. I remember the first stop I made after returning from my mission was the video rental store so I could binge on all the movies I had missed for two years.
For movie nerds like me, being a Mormon kid in Utah came with a lot of anxiety. While I wanted to explore and experience the full depth and rawness that the medium offered, I knew that watching R-rated movies was all but forbidden. We all experienced different interpretations of this “guideline” in our homes growing up. My wife Stefanie, for example, was allowed to watch certain R-rated movies from a very young age. I also knew Mormon kids who weren’t allowed to watch any movies more risqué than PG.
In my home R-rated movies were a rare treat. I remember watching my first R-rated movie, Darkman, one night with my dad when I was 8. I felt so cool and grown-up. During my tween and early teen years my parents would infrequently grant me permission to watch some soft R movies — as long as there weren’t any boobs and the cuss words were minimal. Graphic Violence? Eh, for some reason that wasn’t as big of a deal. In high school watching R-rated movies was an exciting act of rebellion, but it always came with the steep price of guilt. It’s been my guilty pleasure ever since.
The truth is, we all missed out. By any objective standard, many of the best movies ever made are rated R. Now, I have all the usual reservations about the sexism, gratuitous violence, and other harmful messages that we are pummeled with by all the mass media we consume. But here’s the thing . . . I’m a grown-ass man. R-rated movies are intended for mature audiences — people 17 and older. They are intended for an audience that is equipped to handle the intense emotional, mental, and sensory input that many of these films beautifully and artfully deliver.
If you’re reading this, more than likely your new approach and perspective on Mormonism has opened you to a variety of once prohibited experiences. And if you’re like me, you’ve wanted to make up for lost time. So here’s a short list of my 30 favorite R-rated films. Some of the films on this list, like the Matrix, American Beauty, or V for Vendetta will resonate with Mormon misfits like us. Most of them however, I simply feel should be required viewing. Classics like The Godfather, Schindler’s List, and Pulp Fiction are part of the broader zeitgeist of our society. Comedies like The Big Lebowski and Life of Brian will provide a cinematic experience that will make you laugh and blow your mind. Apocalypse Now and The Shawshank Redemption will change your life.
Okay, that’s more than enough cinema geekery for one blog post. I’m not pretending this is any kind of comprehensive or definitive list, and there are dozens of other films that could or should be added. I’d maybe call this a starting point. So, please use the comments here to share your favorites.
In no particular order:
- The Shawshank Redemption
- The Godfather
- The Godfather Part II
- Schindler’s List
- Pulp Fiction
- Fight Club
- The Matrix
- The Silence of the Lambs
- The Usual Suspects
- Saving Private Ryan
- American History X
- The Green Mile
- Memento
- Gladiator
- Apocalypse Now
- Alien
- American Beauty
- Braveheart
- L.A. Confidential
- Inglorious Basterds
- Good Will Hunting
- Die Hard
- V for Vendetta
- The Big Lebowski
- Fargo
- The Terminator
- Terminator 2: Judgment Day
- Life of Brian
- The Departed
- Children of Men
This list caters to Mormon sensibilities which are much more comfortable with violence than sexual content. I would add a number of important films with sexual content and high artistic merit:
Kiss of the Spider Woman
9 1/2 Weeks
Last Tango In Paris
Blue Is The Warmest Color
Waiting for Mr Goodbar
Less Than Zero
Midnight Cowboy
Basic Instinct
Brokeback Mountain
Y Tu Mama También
Eyes Wide Shut
Wild Things
Black Swan
Hear, hear! I’m still averse to gratuitous violence, but almost all of my favorite movies now are rated R. I agree with many on your list and there are several I haven’t yet seen. Hmmm, some additional movies that I’ve enjoyed (not necessarily life changing! but thought-provoking and/or entertaining) include Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind, Nebraska, Boyhood, American Hustle, Argo, Silver Linings Playbook, Looper, The One I Love…and for a bit of dark humor, What We Do in the Shadows.
Oh man, the list goes on….! There’s a new world of great movies to explore once you venture into R territory.
As for R rated movies, here’s my take.
Like you said in your post, and as I have a background in entertainment and art, movies and music are magical.
This is where the Church excels.. They’ve known that all along. Take images, and add specific music and suddenly all of your senses have been touched. The only thing missing is the sense of smell and the temperature settings inside the theater. The Church has relied for years on people not making the comparison of the feelings you get from a movie and the feeling you get in Church. The Church wants people to believe a contrived story that makes you cry or feels emotion is “The Spirit” confirming that the Church is true. That said, if you get the same feeling in a movie, they’re quick to point out that’s just a made up story playing on your emotions but not the spirit.
Now the Church has discovered that if you take an international superstar musician and allow them to perform with the Tabernacle Choir, they can hijack the celebrity endorsement to make the Church seem even more credible as in when the Tabernacle Choir performed with Andrea Bocelli and David Foster.seen here https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=G290ttZR_rM. The performance was amazing and very touching..
Here’s the problem. In the back of your brain, the hypothalamus creates a peptide cocktail which creates a related feeling throughout your body. These cocktails are as addictive as heroin.
Each time you see an R movie, the body craves higher degrees of violence and sexual stimulation to achieve the same level of excitement. You can’t use movie and reality in the same sentence because there’s nothing real about a movie even if it’s “based on a true story”. The movie Argo was “based on a true story” but every Canadian and many Americans know it was a complete misrepresentation of the facts. Jimmy Carter, speaking to an audience of Canadians publicly apologized to Canada. He and the actual hostages all said, “We were there and that’s not what happened”, yet once a movie is made it’s hard to change the minds of the audiences.
The first time you see a Saving Private Ryan or Schindler’s List, certain scenes are so revolting and stun your senses that you are shocked and overwhelmed. After a while though, seeing such movies doesn’t bother you at all and you’re looking for something bigger and badder and more offensive and more stimulating.
If vulgar language offends your senses, the first time you hear an F bomb, it stings but it’s only one or twice and you can justify the value of seeing the movie.. After a while, you see a movie where every other word is an expletive such that there’s almost no script and you almost don’t hear the word at all.
On the other hand a steady Church diet of G rated fare gives an unrealistic view of life. Many members of the Church avoid any uncomfortable anything which offends their senses because they’ve been taught to avoid anything that isn’t Disney G rated. Everything that doesn’t promote the Church has been taught as being evil or anti-Mormon so the second that feel any sense of being uncomfortable, they’re taught that this is “of the devil”.
When legitimate concerns arise, Church members go to their fall back position of bearing their testimony or choosing to run away. My former wife divorced me because she has no capacity to take a position in her marriage and family when things got tough.
When you’ve spent a whole lifetime never having to create your own friendships, genuine relationships, they only last as long as you agree about everything. The first rough spot or disagreement and the 30 year marriage or friendship ends instantly.
A problem with R rated movies too is that writers and directors want them to appear “real and raw” and in the interest of entertainment they condense content to keep the movie moving along. So in a war movie, they go from one battle scene to the next which isn’t realistic at all. In a “love” movie, they couples are falling in love, cheating on each other, divorcing and murdering someone all before the second scene. The topics and story lines are often written by younger writers who have almost no life experience but look to create a sellable script. It’s almost like a Cosmopolitan magazine with 85 positions that will drive your mate wild…on every monthly issue.
If anything, by the Church encouraging us to stay away from a steady diet of sex makes it so when we do see something, it’s still exciting. Too much of a “good” thing isn’t a good thing.
Boy! Do I ever agree with the quality of films on this list. I have been out of Mormonism for so long that I haven’t really thought much about the film prohibition aspect of being a member. I agree that to not experience these films and films like them is to miss out on some really good culture and art. For one of the films, 2001, I have been trying to figure out why this film would be forbidden.
I would add Django Unchained, Silver Linings Playbook, Pan’s Labyrinth, and Cabin in the Woods.
Great list! One thing though, I don’t think 2001 is rated R.
Heard Ex-Machina is good
Unforgiven
Heat
Blade Runner
Amelia
Traffic
Dead Man Walking
John Wick
No Country for Old Men
Platoon
Kill Bill(s)
Run Lola Run
District B-13
Leon the Professional
The Transporter
Children of Men
Twelve Monkeys
Just some of my favorites…
And you’re welcome
Unforgiven
Heat
Blade Runner
Amelia
Traffic
Dead Man Walking
John Wick
No Country for Old Men
Platoon
Kill Bill(s)
Run Lola Run
District B-13
Leon the Professional
The Transporter
Children of Men
Twelve Monkeys
Just some of my favorites…
And you’re welcome
Watch Rain Man, if you haven’t already.
Shakespeare in Love is the best!
You’re right. Actually rated G.
The Royal Tenenbaums
Great list. I would add “300”.
I know, I’m a dumb@$$. I replaced it with Children of Men. ????
I read the title and before I even looked at the article I thought of ‘fight club’
here are two quick philosophical gems…
The Speech
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5kOXwYS-r1A
Lesson in Pain
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zvtUrjfnSnA
A few others I though of you already had on the list (Matrix, Life of Brian)
Best song from life of Brian…
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SJUhlRoBL8M
Mormon Manichean Exceptionalism Redux
For Transitioning Mormons, a must see R rated movie is “A Serious Man”
Mormons are restored Jews, as such you might find this domestic drama to be
hilariously tragic. It’s one of my favorite films for explaining without preaching.
The Coen Brothers are exposing autobiographic experience for all to see.
For Mormons this is relevant to any transitioner seeking enlightenment.
Enjoy, ephima
Ps, the Coen interview is not to be missed
I posted this missive a while back and it has yet to be mounted, please allow another comment, thanks
Mormon Manichean Exceptionalism Redux
For Transitioning Mormons, a must see R rated movie is “A Serious Man”
Mormons are restored Jews, as such you might find this domestic drama to be
hilariously tragic. It’s one of my favorite films for explaining without preaching.
The Coen Brothers are exposing autobiographic experience for all to see.
For Mormons this is relevant to any transitioner seeking enlightenment.
Enjoy, ephima
Ps, the Coen interview is not to be missed
The only movie I haven’t seen suggested here is “Hector and the Search for Happiness”. It’s a nice little Coming-of-Age story about a man who’s emotionally stunted. Given how many TBMs are emotionally stunted, including many of us before our awakenings, it’s a very relatable story.