For many, deciding what to do about garments can be one of the most challenging parts of a Mormon Transition into unorthodoxy, especially in the early stages. Body image issues can be common, as well as keeping them in the closet, under the bed, or wear clothes that are garment-ready when in public. You’re not alone, and if you’re experiencing issues with garments, have a listen while Kate Kelly and Kristy talk about this phenomenon. Kate also details very personal experiences about her garment shift vis-a-vis her excommunication, and, as you always can expect, her unfiltered opinions.
Content warning: If you’re happy with your garment wearing, this probably isn’t the episode for you. Also, language warning (Kate dropped the F-bomb once, I know better than to tell my friend what to say/do). And finally, this list might help in terms of links and more practical tools for underwear shopping post-orthodoxy.
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Friends, I want to gently comment on this subject about underwear. The whole idea that folks who have decided the that the Faith doesn’t work for them OR who have been dumped by the Faith; and then are wanting to pick and choose what areas of belief they will retain, is fascinating to me. It’s a process and a time of reflecting on what really works in a person’s life.
When I was ex’d, the oddest part of being dumped was the feeling of not having the restrictions of garments. At first it seemed like you were naked, but after a short period it was liberating. And it became a symbol that the LDS faith would no longer have their tentacles in all parts of my life. The fear factor that is instilled in people that they aren’t wearing the holy garment is ludicrous.
Think of the billions of other children of God who are equally loved, who conduct the daily business of their lives without the fear mongering about what they are wearing or not. It’s such a nutty little construct that started in Kirkland and travelled to the Wasatch Front. The fact that a 19th century church leader copied a masonic ritual and then instilled fear into believer’s hearts if they did not follow it, is ridiculous. What part of Christ and Christianity does this represent? The early church of the Savior was a simple faith. Funny thing how the “restoration” added hundreds of layers to that faith, including practices of judgment upon others.
I completely understand transitional feelings, moving from the faith of one’s heritage, to a new phase in life; and all that this entails.
Part of a departure from an old faith system that no longer works, is having the courage to NOT care what others think. If others feel a need to judge you because you aren’t showing a little white T-shirt collar under your button down, or that your cap sleeves aren’t showing some tucked up garment sleeve; they really need to get a life! Are they looking at the person inside or outward details? Conversely, we who have left the Faith, need to be equally non-judgmental and look at the beauties and potential that are inherent in each human being.
One thing that has been a positive since leaving the faith: my T-shirts are actually a brilliant white all the time! I laugh at Mormons who think of the garment as a living organism that must be kept alive at all costs. They walk around wearing dingy gray underwear that is long past it’s prime. Used ‘G’s make wonderful dust cloths. And think of it, you can “whistle while you work”, thinking of a phase of your life that has passed! Thankfully!
I remember being all alone in my new apartment after my contentious divorce. It was infested with roaches, roach droppings, dead roaches and dirt. A friend came over. She got right to work. We divided up the garments and cleaned out all the cupboards with bleach then boric acid powder. She didn’t judge me for having a huge selection of: maternity garments, nursing garments, and regular garments. It was so practical for rags! May my enemies fall for into the nasty pit they dug for me filled with Roaches + Holy Underwear.
Now, I wear sexy, matching bras and panties!!! Sometimes I wear a nice red wonderbra. Can’t touch this sacred Mormon men.
[…] and Kate Kelly tackle the taboo underwear topic in the latest Mormon Transitions podcast called What to Do About Garments? This is a topic that many people struggle with, for a lot of reasons, so it’s great to hear an […]